.

The world needs to stop. How can it even go on while I'm suffering like this? I don't want to be the only one who is feeling this. I don't want you to tell me you understand the way I feel. Cause I know that would only be a lie. I need you to trully feel my pain. I need you to suffer the same way I am suffering. Don't tell me I'm selfish. Don't tell me I just need to ease it. I'm alone on this, no matter how many supportive phrases I get. Don't tell me you care. No one really cares. No one really knows what I'm going through. I'm the only one who is burning up inside. And you can not see. You will never see it. Unless you are feeling what I feel at the same time I'm feeling it.

.

I was sleeping when you came and gently caressed my body. I woke up with a smile in my face. We kissed as if the world was about to collapse. I took your clothes off; you did the same with mines.

I could feel the softness of your skin as I drifted through your curves. Touching you, felt like heaven. My hands got lost inside of you.

I kissed every single spot of your perfect body. You surrendered to me. I could feel your pleasure and it only made me wanna love you more.

I just wanted to make you feel, like you’ve never felt before. I just wanted you to love me. But I didn’t dare getting closer to you. I didn’t dare talking to you. Any little thing was enough of an excuse to only posses you in my sweetest dreams.

.

I decided to go for a walk through the forest under the moon light. I put on a coat and left.

The leaves were moving fast, making a delicious noise. Only the trees were playing. There didn’t seem to be any other creature awake. Everybody was quiet. I was walking slowly, didn’t want to corrupt the scene.

At every step I took, the air felt more pure. I was just letting the nature delight me, as I got deeper and deeper.

Suddenly, a strange noise comes to my ears. I try to reach it, but it stops. I stayed still. I wanted to find that thing that seemed to have broken the perfect balance of the forest so badly.

And then all of the sudden, I see those huge beautiful eyes staring at me. I smiled and that happy creature squeals and comes closer to me. I gently pat the owl’s head and he finally closes his eyes and goes to sleep.

.

I wasn't sure why, but he scared me.

I did what he told me to because I was afraid of what might happen if I didn't.

I went back to my bed, and I was shivering. I thought it was because I was angry for having surrendered, but I was actually completely frightened.

I started crying. I was imagining what he may do to me. I wasn't sure if he was capable of those things. Even though, my thoughts wouldn't let me breath.

I know nothing about him. And that only makes my heart beat faster.

I'm locked in my room, I don't dare going out. I'm locked inside of my own insecure mind.

.

I've written this inicially inspired by my brother's wedding and when I was writing it I decided it was gonna be part of my wedding present, so I've made it 'less dark' than all my other stuff.

I'm also posting the version in Spanish that I'm gonna give them.

She was all dressed in white. She was walking towards me. I couldn’t see her face cause of the sun light. But I knew that she was smiling.

As she got closer, I saw a tear running down her cheek.

Every step she took, hurt a little bit more. I could see that in her eyes.

Every single step taken was a prospect slipping through her fingers; it was a piece of the life that she was never going to have.

Her entire world was tearing apart. But there was a whole new horizon at the end of the path, where I was waiting for her. It was so different from everything she’d ever dreamt about, and it frightened her so much…

But she was willing to take the risk. For the first time in her life, she was shinning.

Estaba vestida completamente de blanco. Caminaba hacia mí. Los últimos rayos de la tarde no me permitían ver su rostro, pero sabía que estaba sonriendo.

A medida que se acercaba, pude distinguir una lágrima recorriendo su mejilla.

Cada paso que tomaba dolía un poco más que el anterior, podía ver eso en sus ojos.

Cada paso que tomaba era una posibilidad que se escapaba de sus manos, era un poco de esa vida que ya nunca iba a vivir.

Su mundo entero se desmoronaba. Pero había un horizonte nuevo al final del camino, justo a donde yo la esperaba. Era muy diferente de lo que toda su vida había imaginado, y eso la asustaba tanto…

Pero ella estaba dispuesta a tomar ese riesgo. Por primera vez en su vida, brillaba.

.

I took off my clothes and sat down on my bed. The feeling of the silk was relaxing. I laid down and just stayed still. It was such an intense feeling.

There was a fesh breeze caressing my naked body. I could listen to the birds singing. And there was wet grass scent coming from outside the window. The sun marked out my curves and kept me warm. I felt relaxed. It was as if I owned the world.
I was alone. No one could see me. It was all mine. The softness, the wind, the singing. I felt powerful and yet so defenceless.

I was naked. I was just on my own. All my senses were intensified. I was mighty, but I was still, just a little creature lying on a bed, pretending to own the world.

.

I have this friend who keeps on saying that she is going to find the end of the rainbow. And that when she does so, she is going to find happiness.
She used to look for it only on the rainy days, when this whole thing started. But now she goes out every single day.
She says she is not obsessed. She says she is close to finding it. Just one more day is what she needs.
She wakes up early in the morning and goes walking. She walks, catch a train here, a bus there, looking for the end of the rainbow. She comes back every night with sadness in her face. And there is nothing you can tell her to make her stop. She just says 'one more day'.
I listen to her crying every night. It breaks my hurt. But there is nothing we can do to make her live in reality.